Starting from the beginning. Bilingualism? It’s not easy. 

Do you have an experience when you had to face your weakness? Working in a Korean company as Korean seems like an easy thing. But there are so many unsaid problems. Not only the untold language barriers (reading between the lines) but cultural differences (different understanding and being bit weird). 

 Well, for me, it’s happening constantly in my workplace. I try my best to catch up with Korean skills and other necessary skill sets, including cultural differences. At this point, I really want to stop trying as I have to do presentation everyday and  show how terrible my comprehensive skills are. 

And this exactly feels just like when I started attending Korean school again. Back then, It was like hell. I couldn’t follow what the others are saying nor follow the class. My GPA was barely holding up thanks to my English grade. As time went by, I gave up trying hard for awhile. Korean seemed like an endless crow that would never end crying out. 

Fortunately, I was able to catch up with essential Korean skills I needed to know. Yet, I am still not smooth when it comes to expressing or writing a sentence. It’s still alike shipwreck except for few areas like my professionalism. I can proudly say that I have what it’s necessary to be professional. But I still need to conquer the other fields not to be dragged back to where I was standing. 

Now, I am paying it all back. It is simply endless agony. However I try, my Korean skillset is dragging my legs and not letting me go freely. Thanks to past work experiences, I’ve been able to keep my post. However, the fact that I am not that familiar or active when using Korean expressions, culture, and Korean way of logic and thinking is striking me so hard that I am unconsciously seeking for anything English whenever I am not working. I am sure that I can thrive as usual. 

But really, knowing Korean without understanding the culture fully is just the same as mocking the look of it not the inside of it. I truly want to stop looking up” my identity”. I don’t understand why my boss is trying to identify me as Korean and requests to be the same. Well, to be fair, he has waited for me to catch up with his ideal “Korean employee who used to live abroad”image. If it was something that could be acquired, I would love to adapt it as my own. There must be a way. Till then I will try to be joyful. How am I lucky to face constant challenges everyday?  

If you do have some recommendations, feel free to leave a comment. 

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